"Is Silk a Metaphor for Self-Kindness?"
Hey, it's been a minute.
What started as a quick "one-month break" from blogging turned into a full-blown life reset. I disappeared for over six months, and truthfully, everything changed. I moved, flipped a few major life switches, and basically rebuilt everything from the ground up. It wasn't planned, but it was necessary. Now I'm back, slowly finding my way back into sharing.
I wanted to return to blogging with a bang, so I figured, why not start sharing a few things I've learned on my sewing journey? Some of it I've learned the hard way, some I've tried, and some I'm still a little scared to try.
Today, I was going to start with just talking about silk. Why we hate to love it and love to hate it. But as I kept going and moved on to explore what silk is all about on 'majority' bodies, I realized I was using silk a lot as a metaphor. Did I mean to do that? Probably not. But you know what? In for a sewing machine, in for a serger.
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I was like… sew I wanna sew silk? Because… Why not complicate your life with one of the trickiest fabrics out there?
Disclaimer: I'm not an expert; I'm just someone who did some research and wanted to jot down notes to share here. This isn't legal advice or professional guidance. I'm not telling anyone what to do, and I'm definitely not selling anything or using copyrighted material for profit. Just putting my thoughts on (digital) paper for reference.
Silk has a beautiful shine thanks to how its fibers reflect light, much like tiny prisms. It feels cool in hot weather and warm when it's cold, which makes it great year-round. It's lightweight, doesn't wrinkle much, and is a solid pick for travel clothes.
Fun fact: silk is the strongest natural fiber out there. The tricky part? It's extremely slippery, which makes it somewhat challenging to sew. It can slide around while you're stitching, mess up your seams, cause puckers, or even get caught in the machine.
EXAMPLES OF SILK FABRICS:
Charmeuse, crepe de Chine, dupion, habotai, noil, tussah.
1. Charmeuse
Feel: Very smooth, soft, and shiny on one side
Look: Glossy on the front, dull on the back
Use: Dresses, blouses, lingerie
Note: Feels fancy and drapes (flows) beautifully
2. Crepe de Chine
Feel: Soft, slightly rough texture with a crinkly surface
Look: Matte (not shiny), with a light, elegant feel
Use: Blouses, scarves, dresses
Note: Doesn't wrinkle easily
3. Dupion (or Dupioni)
Feel: Crisp and rougher than other silks
Look: Shiny with slubs (little bumps or irregular lines)
Use: Formal wear, wedding clothes, curtains
Note: Holds shape well, doesn't drape as softly
4. Habotai (aka China silk)
Feel: Very smooth and lightweight
Look: Soft shine, plain weave
Use: Linings, summer clothes, scarves
Note: Often used as a basic, affordable silk
5. Noil
Feel: Rough, nubby (bumpy), and soft
Look: Dull and textured
Use: Casual clothes, suits, home items
Note: Made from shorter silk fibers, it feels more like cotton or wool
6. Tussah (or Tussar) (Is it like Tussar w/ a Boston accent?! Who knows?)
Feel: Coarse and a bit stiff
Look: Natural, dull gold or tan color
Use: Jackets, dresses, traditional garments
Note: Made from wild silkworms; not as soft as regular silk
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Tips for Sewing with Silk (No Stress Version)
• If you've never worked with silk before, start with a silk blend or a thicker type of silk: something like charmeuse or crepe. Super-thin materials like chiffon can be tricky right away.
• To avoid stains, do not use wax or disappearing markers.
• Regular pins can leave holes. Use fine pins (like bridal or lace pins), and try to only pin inside the seam allowance. Or skip pins and use pattern weights instead.
• Silk can get watermarks, so test your iron on a scrap before pressing the real thing.
• Use a small needle (size 60/8 or 70/10), shorten your stitch length to around 2.2–2.5, and go with a fine polyester thread to help avoid puckering.
• For fitting, hand-baste your seams instead of machine sewing right away; this avoids leaving permanent holes.
• If your silk is slippery, cut your fabric in single layers | not folded. It's easier to control that way.
• Silk can shine differently depending on how it's cut, kind of like velvet. To keep your garment looking even, make sure all your pattern pieces are laid out in the same direction before cutting.
• For really slippery silk, lay it on top of tissue paper. Pin your pattern through both the fabric and the paper, cut them together, and sew with the paper on the bottom. It helps keep the fabric from sliding around. You can gently tear the paper away after.
• To stop your machine from eating the fabric at the start of a seam, use a "stitch starter." | Just fold up a scrap piece of thicker fabric and sew it onto that first, then continue onto your silk.
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Side note: I don't like polyester because it doesn't breathe well, feels kinda plasticky, and just doesn't have the same vibe as natural fibers. Plus, it's not great for the planet.
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Silk for the Rest of Us (You Know, the Majority)
Silk has a reputation: delicate, slippery, luxurious. And if you're fat, you might've internalized the idea that it's "not for you." That it clings in the "wrong" places, that it's too fancy for everyday wear, that it doesn't forgive. But silk isn't the problem; fatphobia is.
Silk drapes. It flows. It catches the light. And fat bodies deserve all of that. We deserve to take up space in softness and shine, in garments that feel like joy against the skin. Sewing silk for yourself when you're fat can feel radical, even if it's just a simple top or scarf. You're saying, I get to feel good. I get to be seen.
Is silk harder to work with? Totally. But really, so is unlearning shame. Figuring out how to be kind to yourself, to silence those old harsh voices in your head — that takes guts. Just like deciding to dress for you instead of what everyone else expects.
Sewing your own silk pieces? It's like a practice run for that bigger work of self-kindness. Every careful stitch is a small rebellion against all the "shoulds" and "can'ts" holding you back. It's about giving yourself permission to make mistakes, learn, and shine in your own way.
So yeah, silk might be tricky, however, but maybe it's the perfect fabric to remind us that overcoming shame is complicated, messy, and totally worth it.
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And now, before I sign off (for now)…
This isn't about silk, but I wanted to share a photo of something I sewed on New Year's Eve; it reflects how I was feeling that night: hurting for others, hoping for change, and standing in solidarity.
Thanks for sticking with me through this first post as I'm back! (Honestly, grammarly would not just let me write "post back." It kept on telling me to say "first post." But it's not my first post. It's my first post back. Honestly…)
I'm excited to share more of what I learn (and stumble through) on this sewing adventure. If you've got tips, questions, or silk stories of your own, drop a comment or reach out.
With everything going on right now, it feels more important than ever to build spaces where folks like me, plus-size, queer, BIPOC, non-binary … can come together, share our journeys, and support each other. Sewing isn't just a hobby; it's a way to reclaim creativity, joy, and identity in a world that often sidelines us. I'm here to figure out that roadmap, navigating this messy, beautiful intersection of life and craft. Whether you're just starting out or have been sewing for a long time, let's continue learning and creating in ways that truly reflect who we are.
For a fact, not many (any?) people read this blog (yet). But months or years from now, if you stumble across this and find me, don't hold back. Say hello here or on any other social media platform. My name's pretty unique (at the moment), so you might just be able to track me down.
Have an amazing day!
